Wendy got back on Wednesday night last week, and we were headed north the very next day with a car loaded with kids, coolers, and clothes.
Destination: Orlando, Florida. The 3v3 Soccer Nationals at ESPN Wide World Of Sports.
Evan had two games Friday and two games Saturday, followed by knockout stages on Sunday.
To say it was hot and intense and stressful and soggy would be a huge understatement. According to my fitness app I logged nearly 7 miles of walking each of the three days (25 miles for the weekend) and most of it was spent hauling chairs, coolers, and umbrellas in the pouring rain.
We ended up finishing third in the silver division, and Evan got a trophy and the big announcement and walk across the stage.
It was a very exciting end to a weekend that could not have started rougher. We lost our first four games and by the fourth game on Saturday Evan was totally out of it…
Not playing well, not paying attention, and not impacting the game…
He was a total mess.
Now, I’m okay losing when we actually get beat by a better team…
But when we beat OURSELVES, it really bothers me.
So I sat Evan down Saturday afternoon after their fourth loss and we had a little talk about motivation and stress.
What it comes down to is that Evan is on a really competitive team, probably the most skilled and driven team at his age group in all of Southwest Florida. Only fifteen kids in the whole area made this team, and he was one of them.
He feels a lot of pressure to succeed, and when a player beats him, his head goes into a vicious “you’re not good enough” cycle.
He starts overthinking things.
His muscles get heavy and he starts playing worse and worse. He feels like he doesn’t belong, even though he DOES belong.
So we asked him how we could support him, and his response was that he wanted us to back off, and not give him encouragement or inspirational speeches…
He wanted us to just leave him alone with his headphones and his music and let him do his thing.
So we did, and he played great on Sunday 🙂
An interesting little lesson in pressure and motivation.
Coincidentally, Ronda Rousey fought on Saturday night. I had a couple beers and stayed up to watch her punch some chicks face in.
Somehow, Rousey is able to eat up pressure and spit it out as focused venom. It’s amazing to watch.
I don’t think I’ve seen someone so motivated and determined to reach their goals since watching Jordan’s Chicago Bulls back in the 90’s.
In other news…
Wendy has been back from Europe for about a week now, and it’s been a rough transition to having another adult in the house.
When it was just me and the kids, I decided on the direction, gave the kids their marching orders, and off we went.
No hassles, no arguments, and no fuss.
It’s really been aggravating and it’s led to lots of arguments.
Now it’s not that Wendy’s opinion isn’t valid… Of course it is.
It’s just that even needing to slow down to listen to it is a new experience.
And it’s been a struggle.
The kids see us bickering and see it as a lack of consistent direction, so they’re falling back into their old ways as well. There’s been entirely too much laying around and playing on phones while the dishes rot and the laundry and trash pile up.
I hit my first yoga class in nearly a week last night and it was murderous. Yoga Power Flow with lots of planks. I feel like I’m dying this morning.